3/4/10

I can't believe it has been 2 months since we put something on the blog. A lot has happened it those months. Charlotte turned six, Samantha turned two and Sam turned thirty-one. Each very exciting. We also just had our 9 year anniversary. Be warned this is me just rambling about the crazy state of our lives

On February 8th Samantha had an MRI done to see if they could figure out why her seizures kept coming back. On the 12th we met with her Neurologist. We found out she has a brain tumor and will have to have surgery. We were referred to the Childrens Hospital in Houston to their epilepsy clinic. We met with some great Dr.s there. She has to have a few more tests to see if they can link her epilepsy, her tumor, and her speech delay.

It is interesting she had her last seizure the end of January. This is the longest she has gone with out having one. It was like she needed to keep having them so they would do more testing to find the tumor. She is back to normal. After breaking her leg in December and having the cast on so long, and also she was having tons of seizures then. During January it was like she was depressed and was in a funk. She is back now, singing jumping around happy as a clam (I don't know why clams are considered happy or even if I just made that up). She is the funnest happiest girl. People keep asking how she is doing and it's she is great besides the epilepsy and brain tumor.

Needless to say since then life has been very crazy. There has been a lot of waiting. Sam and I have been way distracted and almost completely forgot our anniversary. I have gone from being fine to freaked out to depressed and back again. Sam has learned that it isn't always better knowing. It is harder for him as a Dr. because it is his daughter and he actually understands the things they tell us. He has a much better understanding of what is going on and what is going to happen.

Luckily we are in a better state diet wise than we usually are. We were working on being healthier and working out. So no gaining 20 lbs over this. I have found that running, moving doing anything is more theraputic than chocolate. I have also been able to weed out our closets and therfore reduce our clutter. We still have a long way to go but are making progress of getting rid of clutter inside and out.

The funny part about this is we are being a lot more over-protective. We are usually pretty easy going dealing with bumps and bruises but not freaking out. We are a lot more sensitive now. We notice everythings with Samantha. We are watching her, is that a seizure, is she favoring her left hand (they said if she was left handed that could link the tumor with the speech delay).

We have realized why we moved where we did. It was hard to leave our last ward and move here. I have a better support system in this ward than I have ever had. It is also nice to have a lot of family support too. I just wish I could focus better. I have really bad ADHD and fibromyalgia makes it hard to think. Both of those are really bad right now. I have a really hard time focusing on anything or getting anything done. Even with my calling of playing the piano for Relief Society, I generally can play any hymn without any trouble, this Sunday I made tons of mistakes because I couldn't focus and my fingers would not cooperate with my brain.

During a crazy day for me I had to get out of the house so I went to the store. I took Sams car because I was by myself. I turned on the Book of Mormon CD (I can't listen to them in my car because my CD player is broken) Playing was 2 Nephi 4.20 "My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep".
the whole chapter is great but that verse reminded me who I needed to lean on. Samantha is his daughter too, so am I.